Brilliant.

That cow is good enough to play for Newcastle...

#3 Or maybe..."you feelin' lucky punk".

:Very good..

Anything is better than this though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0

Commonly known as 'fast-food'.

I'm itching all over now..

#1 Plenty of free fruity drinks tonight then?.

Who is Turner, and where did he/she fall?..

Little boys and their little toys.

He's a wal nutter...

Tomorrows World is the programme he hosted I believe.

Very strange, but I kinda liked that...

It's a bit like Gibraltar where the airport runway crosses the main road, but at least there are gates there, and warning lights.

I'll be able to go on holiday by bus instead of flying.

#2 'Ringworm'..

Well it seemed to work ok, I could hear him...

Oh dear.

I Thort that was very good..

Music by Alan Walker ?

Well done that man.

#1 There are words, but not on here please.

I remember staying in a motel in Yorkshire a few years ago where the bathroom mirror was at least 7' from the floor, needless to say my shave the next morning was a tad 'hit & miss'.

I bet those fish died with smile's on their faces.

#3 He's right though..

Those two guys in the boat carrying melons just seemed to take in their stride like it was normal day at work, and it probably was..

Kinnell..

#5 Yes, Riga is the capitol of Latvia.

There ya go Jakey.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-stoke-staffordshire-43130355

No ref!.

Where's Stanley Park, Canada?

Hilarious..

Blimey...

Well is it?..

Looks like the battery died.

Fresh underwear needed I'll bet.

Candidate for the Darwin Awards maybe?..

It'll be alright after a good paint job...

#2 Back in 1966 myself and 2 pals walked into a bar in New Orleans and were told we couldn't be served because we were white.

#7 Thank you.

I was working with a crane many years ago when it crashed into a junior school playground. Luckily the kids were on holiday at the time.

Anybody know what this #hit is all about?

#2 That's his no-claims bonus out the window!.

#4 That you talking to yourself Jakey? But you're dead right though.

Seems like they knew the drill!

He was driving on the wrong side of the road it seems!..

That's a right pain in the Mesentery..

Childish prat!

Oops! That wasn't supposed to happen.

Bah humbug!..

We used to play with the stuff at school!...

#8 I get paid in spinach.

#4 Nice one!...

Maybe he just didn't fancy her?..

#3 No you're not..

#1 I kinda liked the soundtrack, but one man's meat I guess. It would have been better though if we'd seen the take off. Like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_8Uqsgi3AM

Well done sir!

One of the cutest clips on the net, ever!..

Deffo a nut job!..

I gave up eating nearly 4 years ago and I've never looked back!..

A guy that worked in one of our local supermarkets was on that flight...

Brilliant!

Brilliant..

If Carlsberg made gods........

I bet he was pleased he was wearing underpants that day.

Brilliant, can I upvote twice?

Oh yes, that's a woman driver for sure..

What was all that about?

Maybe the mother ferret wanted it's owner to babysit?.

Well done sir.

That is a very brave man, well done sir!

What a plonker!

#3 Maybe #1 has a speech impediment and he was saying "Darling"

The bear cheek of it.

Silly old goat...

Brilliant..

A bit foolish but also a brave lady, well done gal.

I don't think that was supposed to happen....

'Run Rabbit, Run Rabbit, Run Run Run'...... Flannagan and Allen

#13 Lighten up, surely you can understand my comment?

#11 You filthy beast!...

Maybe he's a trainee sumo wrestler?..

#19.."I think, therefore I am"

#14. I am, well I think I was

#3 Seconded.

#15 Thank you ma'am but I'm spoken for..

#12 Nah, I just wear tight trousers...

#10 Or maybe he should wear a nappy (diaper in the US)..

What would happen if he got to the top and he needed a pee, or something a little more 'urgent' ?..

#11 Poor Jakey he's getting senile...

#7 Too true, but I was still doing that sort of thing when I was 24..

#4 Stop telling porkies, you had a sneaky look didn't you?..

I'm normal in one of them (coff coff) at least...

#1 So are you saying the dog climbed down the ladder and then they played the video in reverse?.

Bullseye.

Couple of hours in the repair shop and a coat of paint, and it'll be ready for flying again.

Wow, scary.

Surely it's up to the race organisers to keep the spectators out of the way and safe.

#6 OK, so the walk was funny, but I'm not in the habit of sniffing certain bodily fluids.

Terminal cancer is funnier than that clip!..

England is getting smaller.,,

What is it he sprays into the tube?

#1 I drive an automatic, and so does my partner.

#3 I'm not sure what you mean, my profile is just the same, except my avatar has changed.

That looked nasty, surely there were fatalities?.

#4 Yes, it's almost an aphrodisiac (iffy spelling there)

#7 Thank you my dear.

#5..All of England is pretty!

#3 So that's how you dress at the weekends Jakey?..

My little Ford Focus will do better than that.

#1 A touch up with a sheet of emery cloth and some WD40 will sort it.

#5 Not these days.

#2 Nah, Wickes.

Anyone know what the **** he's talking about?..

How does he get the washing machine to sing?.

#18 Well obviously I can't prove it on here, but why would I say I'm older when most people would lie saying they are younger. The only time I've said I was older was when I was in the USA in 1966. I was still 20 at the time but said I was 21 so I could get a drink in a bar in Mobile Alabama...

Scary...

#16 Oh no I'm not, born on July ninth 1946, a war baby!..

I spent a couple of years in Australia in the 60's, and the spiders out there are the size of Great Danes..

Well done that judge, he's a star.

#13. Correction, I'm 70..

#9 this is the real me..

I've toured that garden, it's just a few miles from me...

She panders to their every need.

Well done that man.

Brilliant.

Obviously no alarm on the vending machine.

#11 I bet they do, and how would you know?. Have you any personal experience?.

I'll bet those high leg kicks play havoc with their 'bits'

#6 Indeed Jakey, East Lancashire I'd say.

#7 That's not just my profile pic, it's a photo of me!

#5 They're hiding from you...

Love the way that digger bucket slowly disappeared below the surface....

Love it..

Is this the Mexicans demolishing Trumps wall?..

I sometimes get hammered, but in a different way...

Rabbit pie.. yum yum.

Brilliant version of a pretty mediocre original, thanks Jakey...

The world record for a steam loco is held I think by the British made Mallard, and broken way back in the 30's.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvlFeE38WN0

#7 Yes, lovely aren't they?

Memories of my childhood.

Nothing wrong with my ears, they're my pride and joy.

#4. No stick poking on here please JJ.

#6 Maybe because Trump and Clinton had better hair-do's than anyone else...

#20 Pistols at dawn then?..

She can sit on my piano stool anytime she likes...

Some battle!

Last time I changed a wheel it took me half an hour to find the car jack!..

Very pretty!

I know a few brickies who would do for £100 per day, plus luncheon vouchers!...

#1 It's Whitehall 1212..

I suffered the petrol pump failure just two days ago..

#18 Now now Jakey old chap, that's not nice...

A good panel-beater will sort that in a couple of hours!

It takes all kinds I guess...

Nice one Jakey.

You are a kind man whoever you are, you made that child's day for sure...

#1 Gotta agree with you there, Snowy...

#4 Well said, Jakey, this couple are a national treasure almost!

Well held sir..

Disgusting behaviour by the cat there. How would he feel if the mole had a #hit in his house?..

#1 That was a cracking video...

#8 Not really, maybe twice a year?

I wonder if her panties filled up with the brown-stuff after that?

Somebody left their glasses on the front passenger seat...

#7 Well spotted, that was a deliberate mistake. I said it was Richard to see if anyone noticed, and you did, You win todays prize of a trip to the Seychelles!..


Edit...Richard of course is the actor brother of David

I see thunderbox is now the snotr spelling checker...

Nice one thundercloud,,

Well done young sir.

The BBC, best producers of wildlife/ nature films ever, and who best to present them? Richard Attenburgh.

#3 19679 bugs spotted, but I'm short sighted , so maybe I'm wrong?

I bet it was stinking in that cab...

Clever stuff....

I want one!..

Brilliant animation!

Oh dear, it seems thunderthighs has got her knickers in a twist!..

It seems I'm being attacked from both sides of the pond!........time to seek cover me thinks.

#5 That's not fair, my ears are my pride and joy...

Indeed, you're right again thunderthighs!..

"I'm going to turn this off now"........"and go and change my underwear"..

Protected species no doubt?..

#8 OK, I'll take your word for it, and guess you are at least 58?..

#6 Old enough to be your uncle....

#4..You don't half beat about the bush Jakey , why not just kick him in the nuts straight away?.

Brilliant stuff, well done people!

#1 Not really, they're twins!

#3 Not so JJ, friends of mine Live in Hampshire, and they have Red's in their garden...

What happens if one of them needs to take a dump?..

Not much good in an arse kicking contest though!...

#2 Me too

Curry's beware!..

Is that the 'Tabloid press'?

#5 Oi!!

He could be playing for England soon!,,,

Rest in peace Bill!!.....I remember watching that piece on TV a couple of years ago.

Fresh underwear needed there maybe?

#3 Simple explanation!............FEMALE!!..

Why the *uck did I click on that?...

I bet it's murder during 'rush hour'..

#3 I agree but it was still funny in parts.

I guess he wanted us to look at it?...

Brilliant clip!...

Science, Technology, Accidents

I lost thirty quid backing the green..

He cracks me up!..

I thought that's what 'immunization' was anyway?

Very clever.

Freshwater flying fish?...

Apart from removing all the coloured patches and re-sticking them, I've never finished a cube yet!

#9 Jakey boy, on form again I see!..

Determined little chap!...

Great stuff as usual.....

The hottest thing in the universe is my *rse 10 hours after a vindaloo!...

Where does take a leak?..

Nice one...

Like #4 says, if she really wanted to die, she wouldn't have done it in the middle of the road. More like a cry for help.

It just shows what some people will do for money...the doctor in this case.

I just bought a Masterlock for my shed!...

Dad was enjoying that more than the lad!

I bet he needed a change of underwear after that.....

#7 A digestive biscuit is the yummiest biscuit ever, especially chocolate coated ones..

Most of the time anyway!

By gum!..

#6 Steady on Jakey boy, you'll be starting WW3.

I want one..

#7 Spoilsport, I was looking forward to that Jakey!...

Sod that for a pastime!

So that's how babies are made?...

Kinnell!

Will they queue up for you if you need a *hit?

#10 Leave our Jakey boy alone, you know he's just a simple soul!..

He was just showing off..

Back to the drawing board I guess...

#4 Jakey will never be a good boy..

He was a little out of tune!...

Squirrels are lovely with onion sauce, and washed down with a nice red!

No messin'

That's weird!...

But God created the heaven and the Earth...........and also that boil on my ass!...

Smoking is bad for your health!..

Very clever...

I wonder what would have happened if he'd put it on his 'gentlemen's area'?.

I was on my way to the good old USA when that song hit the charts!....happy days

There ya go Jakey boy!

Peter, Paul & Mary – If I Had A Hammer Lyrics


If I had a hammer,
I'd hammer in the morning
I'd hammer in the evening,
All over this land

I'd hammer out danger,
I'd hammer out a warning,
I'd hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters,
All over this land.

If I had a bell,
I'd ring it in the morning,
I'd ring it in the evening,
All over this land

I'd ring out danger,
I'd ring out a warning
I'd ring out love between my brothers and my sisters,
All over this land.

If I had a song,
I'd sing it in the morning,
I'd sing it in the evening,
All over this land

I'd sing out danger,
I'd sing out a warning
I'd sing out love between my brothers and my sisters,
All over this land.

Well I got a hammer,
And I got a bell,
And I got a song to sing, all over this land.

It's the hammer of Justice,
It's the bell of Freedom,
It's the song about Love between my brothers and my sisters,
All over this land.

It's the hammer of Justice,
It's the bell of Freedom,
It's the song about Love between my brothers and my sisters,
All over this land.

Bunch of tossers.

Well JJ, the monk had a dirty brown habit!...

Lets see him do a 'straight 8' now....

#9 Jakey my man, I just wasted 5 minutes of my life watching that *hite!.......so you wanna hear a joke.......Did you hear the one about the homosexual monk?

A bit like me after 8 pints!..

Are they paid as much as footballers?..

That's a load of balls!

There would be a trail of vaporized #hit following me if I ever went on one of those things!

A homeless and hungry person would be begging in a busy shopping area, not a main road!

I bet it was stinking in the cabin after that...

Yup, deffo a fake!,,

Jesus wept, it was faulty, so get a replacement!..

Judge-Jake, No, they are not my real ears, they're false, I left my real ears at home when I got the pic taken!

Judge-Jake, you crack me up with your comments............keep'em coming ..

#6

Dipstick!!

Lucky man!

#5 or worse, he could have had a *hit before he left!..

He'll never make it as an actor!

#14 God wasn't there that night, he was in my bedroom, I heard my GF call his name.

I think his battery was getting low?

Excellent!..

Very clever those Japanese chappies!

That was staged, but also true to life in many ways!

Nice one sir!..

OK for home DIY

.....I'd like to stay on Mars with her..

So what was he doing up there in the first place?

Sad thing is, the bull will lose out in the end!

What's the point?...

It seems Russians are the dumbest people on Earth!

Maybe he should get it patented?...

It would have been better if they'd worn soft shoes, the noise from their shoes on the stages was distracting!

Typical women.....so sneaky!..

Nice one!...

Brilliant!

S'right, she didn't quote his age!

Wow, that was so exciting!..

Brilliant teamwork....

So wrong!!!

Ah, so that's how it works!

Very good!..

Very clever!

They'd heard there was a party along the road!

Where was the maple syrup?

Brilliant!

Did they flush it away?

Holy *hit!

Wicked little buggers aren't they!....

That was the cleaning lady!

Back on form again,..

Maybe there was a power cut?...

I want one!...

Very good!..

As usual.....brilliant!...

What is it with Russians, it seems the don't adjust their speed to the road conditions!

An incredible little boy!!

My sides are hurting!!..

Suppweeyim?

You're one crazy dude, but we still love ya!........keep em' coming...

Great stuff, keep'm coming!...

Seen that a few times but still laugh out loud when I watch it!!

Great video, thanks for posting it!

Great stuff!...

Great stuff, very clever!

10mm drill bit for me!..

It doesn't actually say how big it is!!..........So how big is it??

That's cute...

Well pranked guys!..

Brilliant!

I guess they'll be OK with chips and a glass of Chianti!...

Brilliant!

Nice one!!

Total dipstick!

I once saw a Mantis eating a packet of crisps!

Is it true that a mountain biker never *hits in the same place twice?

Looks like fun!

I'm a vaper, but that's just crazy!

People aren't born racist, they are taught to be racists!

It came in a flat-pack of course!

Interesting

That's class!

Fresh underwear anyone?..

But will it cut them into chips?..

Sweet video!

How did those other ships know it was her birthday?...

Is Christmas coming?

Incredible!

But does it give the times of the buses to the pub from my house??

Nasty!..

Nice one!..

Interesting clip!

I guess he likes trains?

Sneaky little bugger!..

What trickshots??..

Brilliant to see the amazement on those kids faces..

Judging by his accent, he's English?

Very clever!

Did they buy pop-corn at the interval?

Messy bugger!...

Very clever!

I prefer the Windsor

Cats are selfish little *wats, and only think of themselves.....this cat was probably just hungry!

Great video..

I love these violent clips!

Very clever!

A danger of growing up too quick me thinks?.........lets hope her parents stop it going to her head!

Brilliant!

Nice one!..

A very moving story!..

Very clever..

Not really funny!

I fancy Louise, she's a doll!

Absolutely brilliant!..

Nice one Dad!!..

Brilliant!

I guess us human's aren't that bad after all.

I've got a GoPro, now where do I learn to fly like that??....

That road needs serious music lessons, it was way out of tune!...

Well held sir!...

Loved the music!..

Stops you falling asleep I guess, on a long boring drive!..

Interesting!....

A little darling!..

Brilliant..

Weird!

Damn, I blinked!...

The guy on the 5th floor second from right was miming!...

What's the full story?

Kinnell!

Oh yes, America, not one of our better ideas. Perhaps we should colonise it again?

Brilliant!

Imagine getting your bits caught in that!..

Vegemite is delicious on toast!

Copied from Ask.com.....


A group of rabbits actually has a few names. They are called a herd when they are domestic, a litter when they are young, and a colony, warren or nest when they are wild.

Wow....brilliant!

'the most beautiful sounds ever heard' ....my arse makes better sounds than that thing!..

Beats a box of matches I guess.

Awesome!.........efficiency with no-holds barred!

Laughed my butt off!...

Brilliant!...

Wow!.....that's incredible.

The hard bit would be sourcing new parts to repair them!...

If only the World was run by children!

Oh my god!!!........and to think we invented the USA!

Brilliant!

Brilliant!

Totally brainless idea!

Well done that mouse.

kinnell!fresh underwear needed

Soiled underwear springs to mind at those speeds!.....

Soiled skiddies seem to be the problem of the day?..

Assholes!!

Yup, FAKE!

Brilliant!...

Brilliant!!

Brilliant!

Brilliant!

Brilliant!

I want one!..

I just love 'fly on the wall' stuff!....

OK, so what's it doing?

Brilliant!..

Nice cleavage!..

Brilliant idea.

Such a cutie!

He didn't look both ways before he crossed!

Thats so cute!!...

Very clever!

It went to a good cause!...

What a dickhead!

Dickhead!!

Brilliant work!

Brilliant!

Ain't she just gorgeous!

Strong stuff!

I would,would you?

I prefer a hotel room or a chalet!

Well done that shopkeeper!

Nice car..

So true!..16

Adele has certainly made an impact on the world!

Brilliant!

What a heap of excrement!..

'kin nutcase!

Very funny

Yup, fresh underwear needed!..

~War is the result of religious teaching....religion breeds and teaches hatred.........all organised religion should be banned.

*hit music though!

I want one!

Brilliant!

Natural selection!

Not in the least funny!

And I thought the Indian's were inteligent people!..

Funny looking egg-box!..

Lets hope nobody farted!...

Brilliant!

Beautiful!

Brilliant!..

She's such a cutie!!

Crazy *astards!....

The cold caller was a total *anker!!....He was, after all, told to *uck off, but refused to listen to the 'paying customer' and continued to irritate him with his braindead and persistant *hite!

K'nell!.....wish I could do half that!

Amazing feat!

Wow!!!...........Absolutely brilliant!

Absolutely brilliant, well done guys!

Absolutely brilliant!...

Brilliant!

Here's your problem!

My thoughts exactly!

Brilliant!

That kid is brilliant, I would employ him any day!

Sore head I'd say!

What the *uck was that all about?

*ucking knobhead!

Faked!

Fake