Just brilliant!

Oh you big softy.

Dead became the big sleep
Gay became homosexual
Pooh became a bear

#2 Haha...funny...what are you doing on snotr, shouldn't you be starting to celebrate New Years Eve...hanging out with friends, women, beverage of choice in hand...counting the minutes to 2017?

#3 Just going out for an afternoon coffee, Happy New Year.

Dead became the big sleep
Gay became homosexual
Pooh became a bear
Screwed became ripped off
Christmas became ripped off
H20 became water
Dog became an ugly woman
Moose became an ugly woman
pig became a police man
MPH became KMPH

#4 Enjoy your coffee outing (at Starbuck's) and a wonderful 2017 for you too, my dear snotr friend ....the last one on your list needs to happen asap!!

Some of these i did not think about until he listed them, he is so right, change the name and the problem is goes away, that's Magic.
Politicians can work magic, they can make anything Vanish,
Happy new year everyone.

Full, non-glitchy version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o25I2fzFGoY

#5 Not Starbucks I prefer a proper coffee at a proper coffee shop.

#8 Agree, although, must say, Starbuck's is pretty dang good, I love it.

#9 How do you take it? (please don't say "Usually through the mouth and down the throat) I mean Latte, flat white, espresso, Americano, instant?

#10 while showering (not wasting time!)

Severe mental retardation became feminism!

#11 Doesn't sound like any Starbucks I've ever been in, but it has been a while.

#13 Who is talking about Starbuck's?

#14 Oh

#15